Last night was a night of many tears and goodbyes. My parents and got to spend some quality time together Thursday through Saturday. For my mom and I it was laughing at how bad X Files was and struggling to get my bag under 50 pounds. My dad and I had a good time going to see The Mummy (can you tell I was trying to enjoy America as much as possible before I went?) and reminiscing about how much I've grown etc lol.
Then, last night I had my final dinner with my parents, where my mom would randomly tear up, much to the amusement of my father and I. After dinner, I had my closest friends come over and we didn't do much but just being with them was a blessing. We spent the evening showing down on American food and just sitting on my roof, scaring my mom half to death, talking about life and basically everything. Sitting on that roof I just realized how God is in control and has been in control of my life, even though I have totally fought him every step of the way. Just in Raleigh in general this is evident. I did NOT want to be in Raleigh, I thought I would never build the quality relationships in Raleigh that I had in Delaware. I saw Raleigh as a holding place before I went on to college, well apparently Uganda, and I never expected to build ties and extremely strong friendships. Sometimes I wish I could just see the bigger picture that God has in front of him, but at the same time, I don't think I would be as amazed and in awe of Him as I am right now if I had seen the big picture. Saying goodbye to my friends made me so thankful that God had sent me to Raleigh, I realized how much these people had touched my life, and even got to hear how I had touched and effected someones life that I never expected to touch.
This morning was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. Every step of today reminded me that I am both not a little girl anymore but hardly an adult. I said goodbye to my parents, my mom bawling again, and rode up the escalator in a mix of holding back tears and excitement. I think I was super nervous because today was just a jumble of awkwardness. On my first flight I hit a woman in the head with my sweatshirt, she flipped, and I felt like a five year old. I changed flights in Pittsburgh and every moment I thought to myself, what I am not old enough to be doing this! I finally got to Pearl River, NY around 2:30 and I got picked up by my own driver and was like OK now I feel old!
Everyone at the office is really nice. They showed me around and I got a few things in order and then got to get some well needed rest! I have two days of training with two other single people, one named Lisa who is heading out to Tanzania and one named Ryan who will be working at Dwelling Places in Uganda and is actually out there on the same time frame as me. Then on Wednesday Lisa, Ryan and this adorable family of four who are heading out to work at Rift Valley Academy, and I will be heading to JFK and all flying to London together. Lisa is going to be enjoying her 15 hour layover in London and I think that Ryan and I may join her!
I am almost wrapping this up I swear. I just have to say I can already tell that God is going to teach me so much. Just sitting with Ryan, Lisa, Rusty and Brooks at dinner tonight we all got a chance to tell why were there and stuff and it was so evident that God had planned it all out. Nothing went according to any of our plans. One of the questions on the application to get here was are you flexible. I thought I was pretty flexible but with what he has taught me already and what I have heard from people tonight, we all have a huge lesson in flexibility and trust that has been and is being taught to all of us!
One more thing and then I swear I am done. On the plane I had the chance to re-read my favorite parts of Irresistible Revolution and one thing really stuck out to me. I know that I am not capable of doing anything big, God is but I am not. But what I really want to pray for God to show me how to do is to live out this. This is a quote from Mother Teresa and is going to be one of my many visions for this trip:
" We can do no great things, just small things with great love. It is not how much you do, but how much love you put into doing it."
Peace and Love. Pray for me as I am still quite nervous and don't even have a solid idea of what the next five months will look like! Pray for my mom that she doesn't have a breakdown and pray for my dad as he consoles her lol!
1 comment:
That sounds so amazing already, and like a totally different world than here. miss you and think about you a lot
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